Sad but True........

Positive thinking is incredible, it can manifest lots and lots of things, and everyday I see the incredible power of this.  I am however not invincible in my ability to create my desires.  I have days when my positive abilities dwell beneath the surface of the earth, with the worms.  Underground where I just can't seem to reach down and dig it out.  Though the gods have been smiling down on me, and one good thing after another has been happening for me, I am perplexed as to why I can't see to manifest one very important thing to make this dream a reality.  MONEY....the end all and be all of the continuation of this crazy adventure.  We work our kesters off, to pay bills, and buy wood.  Grain and mason jars, seedlings and groceries....and there seems to not be enough left over for the dream kitchen and dairy.  For this farm to be financially viable, we must have a dairy that is able to be licensenced by the state of Maine, and a kitchen that can be as well.  Currently we are giving away as much cheese as we can make, and milk to whom ever would like it.  The ice cream we make is incredible and I could make a simple living on the ice cream alone, if I only had a commercial ice cream machine.  Not to mention what its going to cost just for the labels for all this milky goodness....Don't get me wrong.  I am not complaining, just sending it out to you all and the universe that I need some help.....I need a Philanthropic Knight in shining  armor to come and save me from my distress.  When I day dream about this farm, I do it with the mindset of having a bottomless checkbook, and although the money if flowing freely, the farm is never ostentatious or overdone.  Its simple and classy and open to whom ever wants to visit.  To whomever want to come and learn, how to farm, how to care for animals, how to cook and entertain...To whomever want to come and talk about their dreams they have been afraid to pursue.  This farm WILL be a place for people of all ages who have felt the crushing denial of their dreams, it will be a place to learn things that you have always wanted to know about farming and its potential, and how it can be incredibly stimulating for all aspects of your life.  It will be a place to find who you are.  It has been that place for me, In such a short period of time, Just over a year I have come to the simple realisation that being who you are and loving that person is incredibly important to your success in life.  I am passionate about this lifestyle and its rewards, and it rewards me everyday.  Now with all this positivity if I can just manifest a power ball win, or wealthy investor in a really cool local farm I would be set for life....So I will not let the tiny creeping negative thoughts out weight the positive and somehow....someway I will have this dairy and commercial kitchen so our Delicious goat milk products can be enjoyed by our friends and neighbors.....
I thank you all for keeping up with this crazy ramblings of a friendly female farmer....
Nighty Night....

Why did you name it smiling goat farm?

Seriously!  How could you resist that smile?  Mae and her naughty goat herd mates are constantly sporting that shit eatin grin.  Goats smile alot.  I'm not sure if its because they are always happy, or if they enjoy the hijinks's they are always getting into?  I'm sure its a mixture of the two really.  Goats seem unfazed by the daily grind so to speak.  They are a great animal to use as a comparison to the positive way of thinking about life.  Eating grain is definitely like meditating for them....at least they seem the most ZEN while they are chowing down the sweet feed.  As long as they have green grass, scrubby shrubs and sunny days....they continue to smile....Even on the rainy ones, I can get a smile for a salted peanut.  We named the farm simply for the goats....they have helped us from the very beginning of this journey.  They provide us with an incredible fresh product...which more people need to be enjoying by the way.....They provide us with companionship and friendship...They are definitely confidants.  They are warm bodies to lay your head against while milking in the dead of winter....I could go on and on...They are lovely animals!  So that's why we named the farm Smiling Goat Farm! 

Its Over....all over....

Two Years....of homework and studying, cut fingers and stained coats...amazing plates and devine desserts.....Of Raping Environmental science teachers and incredible art teachers.....of female chefs who inspired me...each and every class.....and its all over.....
I woke this am totally physically and mentally exhausted....I had been holding in all the tired and crazy for months now....and I really needed to just sleep it all off.  I have been trying not to think of the Beth outside of YCCC.  Who she will be?  Its odd leaving school and I wonder just how many people feel this way after a long stint at college...focusing all your energy on one thing..and suddenly having to focus it elsewhere. 
Well my friends its the next step in the adventure of the friendly female farmer....I hope you will all stay with us to see us progress....

the friendly female farmer

Thank You, Thank You, Thank You.......

Its getting late on Sunday night.  The Sunday night before my last 3 days of classes at YCCC.  Boy oh boy it has gone quickly.  As I am sitting at the table, writing thank you notes to the people who have helped me through and inspired me to be more and do better, I can't help but think back on the past two years at school and what had brought me to YCCC.  As I have said a few times in the past few speeches I have had to give.....I never thought in a million years I would be here. Until I made the decision to go back to school, I felt lost and wasn't sure what I wanted to be when I grew up.  Its something I am sure many people suffer from.  I found myself while going through the culinary program at YCCC.  I figured out who I really am, and I am totally OK with that.  I have made the decision that I will do only the things that motivate me, because when you do what you love the money follows you.  I have experienced so many wonderful things in the past 2 years.  I have made contacts and networks that I never would have found, had I not decided to come back to school.  I was never a good student, however I don't believe that was totally my fault, and I simply have to wonder, if my past educational experiences had been anything like what I had at YCCC, might I be in a different place?  The past is the past thought, and as I move forward onto another adventure in my life, I will take my experience at this wonderful college with me for years to come.  So thank you, to my wonderful husband for suggesting and supporting me the whole time.  I love you with all my heart and am so happy we are FINALLY together.  To my parents, who just get cooler and cooler....thanks for trying everything I make and loving it......You two are the best parents any girl could ask for.  To my wonderful siblings, for simply being you....Love you both so much. To my girlfriend Jess for all the laughs we have had over the past 2 years.  I love ya, and will miss having labs with you, but I know we will be two of the most successful graduates YCCC has ever seen....( Positive thinking is powerful stuff people )   To my friends and family who have tried and loved my food as well, and continue to ask me for recipes....the cookbook is in the works...
Finally to my YCCC family....without you all I would not have had the success I have had.  Your support and guidance has meant the world to me.  I love you all and will miss you a great deal.  So here is the a week full of finals and saying goodbye to a great time....
Thank You.....Thank You......Thank You...........

the friendly female farmer.....

Toot your own horns, cause baby sometimes you just need to.......

For what seems like forever looking back on it....I had very very very low self esteem.....I didn't believe in myself and definitely partook in self deprecating activities.  I let myself be told over and over again that I was unworthy and unable to do so many things....My career choice was stupid and unattainable, my thought processes about life were silly and unrealistic....Simply said, I was being told that being me was just not an option. 
Fast forward to almost 3 years ago now.....I divorced my old life and moved onto a much more supportive and exciting new adventure.  I returned to college and have reached the bars set for me over and over again...more often than not reaching them and hurtling right over the top. Just recently being named STUDENT OF THE YEAR AT YCCC...I couldn't be more humbled and thrilled to have been chosen....still in awe of it all....
  I have purchased the dream farm...that in my mind I can see finished and full of excited friends, family and interesting visitors....WE are in the midst of renewal in the form of baby goats and the return to making cheese and ice cream and whatever else can be made with goats milk....
Its an incredibly exciting time, and I have to thank my support system for it....For my husband, for my parents and siblings...for my friends and family supporting me on facebook and reading this blog....if it wasn't for you all, I wouldn't have had to courage to success in this thing we call life....
I have learned so much in such a very short period of time....but the most important thing I have learned is to give of your TRUE SELF....be not afraid of that person that may be hidden underneith....Tell him or her to burst forth and be real....When you come out....GIVE...as much as you can....because when you do....amazing things happen...Wonderful people fall in love with you...Amazing role models and leaders come into your life and the neat little world of networking comes into play...you might be surprised by what happens....
and beyond all that....TOOT your own horn....if you are really good at something...do it and tell people about it....

A hardened farm girl.......

Losing animals on the farm is a part of life....Because I know this is going to happen, doesn't not however make it any easier to experience.  Going to the barn and finding 3 dead kids was heartbreaking.  Having to deal with their lifeless bodies even more so.  These times call for introspection and deep thoughts.  There is always a bit of doubt when death occurs, even thought you know its not your fault.  Questions like, am I doing the right thing?  Am I really cut out for this life?  Even thought I know the answer is indubitably YES!  Farming isn't easy, and its far from glamorous....and even though we have experienced a loss.....hopefully we will be blessed with a healthy set of kids from the next goat to give birth....
I think experiencing this with calmness and reflection has helped me to see that....I am human, and can experience loss and still go on with a positive attitude...
Be strong in all you do....take a minute to reflect and then move forward....always with positivity in your mind....
There is a reason that all things happen......

Enjoy this lovely spring day...and thanks for hanging in there with me....Exciting things are happening....For me and my husband, and our farm....

the friendly female farmer....

I'm on a Quest....a quest for the perfect PICKLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ya you heard it folks, I'm on a quest for the perfect pickle......Pickles just so happen to be my favorite food...or at least its up there in the top 5 for sure....very close to the top of the top 5..just so you know how serious I am.  I LOVE PICKLES.....there its out in the open for all to hear and see....
Ok people...lets get serious.  I know how I feel about pickles....how about you.  Did your grammy or memere make the best pickles ever and you wish right at this very moment you could have one....I know I am planning a trip to my memeres in hopes of absconding with the recipe for dilly beans...Oh did I mention I love all kinds of veggies pickled....green beans, carrots and cauliflowers...cabbage and red onions etc etc.......each requiring a special recipe to enhance the flavors of the veg...
So why am I telling you this you are probably wondering....well I am hoping you will comment on this blog with a recipe....Part of the reason I am on this quest is because my husband has thrown down a challenge to me, to put away all our food for a year in the soon to be constructed root cellar. So a years worth of pickles is a lot of pickles....and imagine if you could a year full of crappy pickles.....oh the horror....I am not sure I could make it through....So I need your help, your expertise in the field of pickle making....
Here are some very simple stipulations.  The pickle must have crunch...a pickle is not a pickle without some serious texture...I need the snap and crunch....
It can be of any flavor...such as dilly or garlic, kosher or bread and butter, mustard or gherkin...I would really love to have a recipe for cornishons...Variety is the spice of life right...
So I will post picks of the canning process and finished products and tell you all how each one turns out....Here is your chance to help out the friendly female farmer..
Thanks Ya'll
the friendly female farmer......